There are times when my mind is too busy even in my solitude. My thoughts are sometimes shouting for attention even in the silence of my own company. Sometimes, my last thought before going to bed is the very thought that enters my mind upon opening my eyes in the morning. There is no rhyme or reason that can be fathomed. At times like these, I would put on my trainers, go outside and just run.
When he was home, my Papa used to run everyday at the break of dawn. He was often out of the door before anyone else was awake in the household. I have always thought that his running or jogging was just a habit he developed when he was away from us to keep fit. Now that I am older, I know better. It is more than just getting fit.
Some of my friends think that I am mad for wanting to run/jog/ walk so early in the morning. I actually look forward to my hour of running/jogging and walking in the morning. It is the time when I can escape even my own thoughts. I do not need to think of the why, the how or even the what of things. Sometimes there is just no reasoning for some things or someone. I just lose myself into the music piped through my earphones and run. The only decision I have to make is whether to go straight ahead, left or right. The cogs in my head only have to process the lovely sunshine and how it feels on my skin, the beautiful colourful flowers along the way and just breathe. I only need to think about pounding the pavement, putting one foot in front of the other and just running to that next post. It is an hour of no complications…an hour of no questions with no forthcoming answers… an hour of clarity.
I don’t know if it is the increase blood flow, increased oxygenation or the release of endorphins from the exertion but I find peace in that hour. I understand now why my Papa runs daily. I would do the same if my schedule permits it if only to have an hour of not thinking.
So for an hour, I will put down all my baggage and stop overthinking things to just breathe and run.